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Hörculees fixed my Lamp

Urheber: Matt
Datum: 2004-04-19
Hinweis: Dieser Murks ist nur auf Englisch verfügbar, da sonst jeglicher Witz verloren ginge.

Oh no....!!!

Matt you eediot! Do naht buy lamps from manufacturers which turned away from ze gods! Their prahducts are cursed and will break soon after you buy them! I know it because I'm Hörculees, ze son of Z00s.

hercules1.jpgI told you! Now look at this! Ze switch of ze lamp is totally broken. No wondah it could naht be törned on anymore! Ze switch did naht keep its position, so ze lamp chust flashed for a shoaht time.
To show you that nobody is bettah than Hörcules I'll install a new switch. Föahst I use my divine powah to rip out ze old switch.
hercules2.jpgThis switch must have come directly from ze underworld! It is made of cheap plastic. I doubt it was secure enough to switch 230V. Ze whole lamp is manufactured very bad. It has naht been modded before, ze lustah töahminal and de cheap cables are all original!
hercules3.jpgSince Hörculees does naht have any money I had to borrow a switch. I found an appropriate one in my Buddy's lamp. Then I knocked him down with my feest so he didn't see me stealing it.
hercules4.jpgOn de way home I was attacked by some eevil mortals who wanted to steal my switch from me. They didn't know that no mortal has a chance against Hörcules, so I killed them all with my bare hands. I hope they go straight to Hades!
hercules5.jpgFinally I was able to install de switch. It is a massive black switch made in Italy which is rated for 250V @ 2A. I would have preferred a Greek product but zis was ze best I could find!
hercules6.jpgNow de only thing that is missing is a hole in ze lamp's case to mount de switch. Unfoahtunately my father got very ahngry because I brought chaos to earth and took away all my Hörculees powah! So I had to use my 18V battery powahred Kinzo drilling machine to do ze job.
hercules7.jpg9 mm, what a pörfect size! If this was one of my other movies I could have used my gun instead!
hercules8.jpgAfter using all my remaining powah I managed to reassemble de whole lamp. I was curious if I fixed it correctly, to test it I asked my father Z00s to send a lightning down to earth which was strong enough to provide de lamp with electricity.
hercules9.jpgIt verks, thanks to the divine powah of Hörculees!

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